I Remember

Just missin' my Annie Bo Bannie today.

Bring Me some Blues

There are some things in your life that just simply make you feel good. For years I've been going to The Dinosaur Bar-B- Que restaurant in Syracuse, NY. It's a biker hangout, blues bar, and a great food place. They're quite famous now and have one in Rochester, NY and one in New York City.
Annie, my daughter, was usually in the Hospital in Syracuse when she was sick and so many times after visiting her I would go over to The Dinosaur and hang out and listen to the band. Blues made me feel good. I always loved being there, it was so comforting after seeing Annie in the hospital. It's a funky cool place with a great atmosphere.
It's been awhile since I've been there. I can't stay awake anymore! The band doesn't usually start till around 11:00 and it's more than an hour drive away, but I'm feeling like I need to hang. There's nothing like a warm summer night on the bike and headin' to The Dinosaur for some blues, but alas I'll have to take the car it's a little chilly. Anybody want to come?

Filling My Pond

For those of you who are interested, the big night for my friend went very well and I had a blast. I had as much fun getting ready to go as going because I felt like myself. I felt pretty and proud to be sitting with my friend in a huge ballroom full of muckety mucks and being comfortable in my skin. So comfortable that my shy friend wanted me to sit next to him for comfort an solace when he was the one being honored for his enormous contributions to the community. Pretty cool.

I have spent time on myself and with myself. My pond was empty for many reasons and I'm filling it back up, my way. I don't care what other people think about how I'm doing it. It just doesn't matter. One thing that will make me crazy in a hurry is listening to too many people's opinions about what I should or should not be doing. The more quiet I become, the more clearly I can hear God.
It seems to be working.

Speaking of filling my pond here's some pictures from my morning walk. Enjoy! I sure did!

My Own Skin

My husband and I were invited to a award dinner for a good friend of ours Friday night. It's not going to be a totally formal event, however it will require some pretty nice duds and it has been a loooooong time since I've purchased anything decent to wear. Normally shopping for cloths is rather traumatizing for me, because I have a lot of trouble finding things that fit me. Now I have some added bonus going on in the booty and well, this had the potential to be a very bad scene.
Well, I knew all this before I left and I said to myself  "Self, you need to be realistic. Don't expect to look 30 and thin, 'cause you're not. Don't beat the crap out of yourself every time you look in the mirror. Just do the best you can."
Guess what? It worked. I found a great outfit that I'll be able to use more than once. Plus, one of the reasons it looks so good is because of my height. How do you like that? Well, you probably don't care much, but it's a very big deal to me.
My point is, I didn't set myself up. I usually figure out I've done that way after I've had a giant hissy fit.
 My looks have changed so much in the last few years that it's been a difficult thing to get through too. I mean 50 doesn't look like 30 unless your really working on it or you're a movie star.
Learning to let go of all the bullshit I tell myself has been quite a process. It's a relief and a comfort to just be. Be in my own skin, wrinkles and all, extra bootyliciousness and all. I may not look like a movie star to anyone else, but I think I felt like one tonight and I'm excited to get all dressed up and go out to cheer for my friend.

Happy Birthday Annie

Happy 28th birthday Annie. I love you and I miss you. mom

Once in a Blue Moon

Once in a blue moon you get to bring in the New Year in a place like this. my hubby and I spent the night out here. It was great. It just doesn't get any better than this. (except that I DO know the true meaning of freezing my ass off, the out house was a bit breezy!)
Happy 2010 everyone ! Thank you for a great year of blogging!